Mercedes Opens Office in Iraq


OK, I was going to write up a story about a Mercedes Benz press deal entitled \”The All-New Mercedes-Benz GLK asks: Where Do You See Yourself?\” (seriously MB, you\’ve sunk to that level of marketing?), but while looking for the info on Daimler\’s press site, I came across this:

\”Official Opening of the Daimler Representative Office in Iraq\”

Are you kidding me!?

Screw how I see myself with the GLK, you guys have set up operations in Iraq? Yeah, like I\’m not going to mention that.

OK, I can understand the mindset here, a market is a market is a market, and SOMEBODY is going to have to be the rep. But for the love of God, how\’d you like to be that poor guy.

\”Hans! Come into my office for a moment.\”


\”Hans, I have a new assignment for you. We are giving you a promotion, a 14% raise in your salary, and you will be in charge of our newest field office.\”

\”I am! Great! Thank you! Where\’s the new field office.\”


\”What?! Mogadishu was already taken?!\”

Yeah, I know, things are better in Iraq now then they were, say, 18 months ago, but it\’s still about 20 minutes away from turning into Apocalypse Now, and honestly, what the hell is Mercedes thinking? Sure, sure, I bet that new E-Class with the optional armor plating will be a big seller, as will the latest G-Wagen, but the last footage I saw (and this was from 20 minutes ago) it looked like your average Iraqi was too busy avoiding bombs and AK fire to run down and check on the options available on the latest C-Class.

\”The stable and economically prosperous development of Iraq is of crucial significance for the future of the Middle East region.\” Says Mercedes. Yeah, the salient point here guys \”FUTURE\”, as in the present looks like a real bad place to do business in anything besides ammo, body-bags or whole plasma.

Best of luck with that new business your setting up. Praise the Lord, pass the ammunition and hand me some of those sales brochures, will you.

Here\’s Mercedes\’ press release (crazy bastards):

Official Opening of the Daimler Representative Office in Iraq
Stuttgart/Bagdad, Feb 17, 2009
Stuttgart/Baghdad – In the presence of German Foreign Minister Dr. Frank-Walter Steinmeier and Nuri al-Maliki, Prime Minister of Iraq, Daimler AG today opened a corporate representative office for Iraq in Baghdad. The opening is a first concrete step toward the company’s return to the Iraqi market, as well as a demonstration of Daimler\’s wish to support the Iraqi government and population as they rebuild their country\’s infrastructure.
The stable and economically prosperous development of Iraq is of crucial significance for the future of the Middle East region.
Last July, Daimler and the Iraqi government signed a memorandum of understanding that lays the groundwork for continued cooperation between Iraq and Daimler AG.
\”Our new corporate representative office in Baghdad will serve as an ideal platform for helping the Republic of Iraq to return back to normal and for introducing our Mercedes-Benz products,\” said Andreas Renschler, the Daimler Board of Management member responsible for Daimler Trucks & Daimler Buses.
The new Daimler representative office is located in Baghdad\’s international zone. One of the office\’s key tasks will be to define the market opportunities for trucks and buses. In February 2008, Daimler established a motor vehicle training workshop in Erbil in northern Iraq, where it provides skilled workers from the local area with the qualifications needed for the growing labor market.